July 1st 2022: Friday night: lying in my own sick, on the streets of Tokyo. I had tried to act sober for a bouncer in the nightclub, threw up on his shoes and consequently thrown out the club…allegedly. I don’t remember this happening. I was passed out.

July 1st 2023. Saturday night, now lying in my own bed. Comfortable. Happy. 6 months sober. 

Drunk Beginnings 

University nights out; boxed wine, a crate of Corona or some apple soju transformed me to into someone else. Someone outgoing, talkative and an incredible dancer (okay, that last one is debatable).

The Decision

Money was being poured down my throat, only to be forgotten about. Weekends were being wasted. My fitness was being impeded. Most worrying, was the depressing thoughts and hangovers. Alcohol temporarily blocked my anxiety and low self confidence, only for it to return 10x worse the next day. 

It was time for a change.

Tips to Maintain Sobriety

1. Set personal ground rules that you want to follow. Whether it’s being sober for just a week, a month, or only drinking on special occasions. You don’t have to give up drinking forever but there is strength in saying “no”.
2. Surround yourself with those that support you. Your habits are closely linked with who you spend time with, and the quality of our lives depends on the quality of our daily habits.
3. Be present. Continue to join your circle of friends at events, celebrations, wherever. People are there for the memories and relationships, not the drinking.
4. Be yourself. Sobriety makes you choose your actions more wisely, and become conscious of how you spend your time or who with. You can still dance or act silly on nights out, it’s still a great opportunity to let your hair down. Don’t be afraid to be yourself.
5. Hold/ drink something. It doesn’t need to be alcoholic, but physically holding or drinking can help you relax, people tend not to care much of what’s inside. These days, almost every beer brand will have a non-alcoholic version. There are even clean versions of gin, rum and vodka made by companies such as Clean Co.
6. Plan for the next morning. (A bonus tip I’ve stolen from a close friend) Have something fun or meaningful planned for the following morning. You won’t feel guilty missing the night out, instead you’ll wake up with purpose and enjoy the day ahead.

Personal Realisations

1. “Drinking is an excuse for making an average situation feel great.” 
2. Being sober at an event is scary but it strengthens your confidence and conversational skills. 
3. You won’t lose your friends for choosing to put your health first. They want you to be happy and healthy. 
4. Sobriety provides you with more time, energy and money to spend on friends, family, yourself and others.
5. You’re not missing out on as much as you think. Pure, meaningful memories rarely include the nightclub, vomiting in the bathroom or drunk journeys home. You become more conscious of how you spend your time. You are in control of the memories you make.

A Sober Future?

I never had a serious issue with drinking. It’s been a relatively easy but insightful experience. Maybe I’ll have a drink in the future, but for now, I don’t have a particular desire for one. Being sober has helped me become outgoing and sociable, on my own terms. I’ve become more confident and happier. I’m in control of my thoughts, actions and feelings.

I will admit, my dancing is still terrible. 

Take care,

Harry